Showing posts with label My views. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My views. Show all posts

Two years post Nirbhaya.. did anything change?


It has been two years since the Nirbhaya incident took place in New Delhi that shook the whole world. This brutal incident has tormented the belief of how women are treated outside their home. There were several candle light vigils and innumerable protests in different parts of India which lead to the arrest of the molesters and court has also given their verdict in a short time.

But two years after this incident, I ask this question to myself -- can I travel safely in my city? The answer is still NO. This is not just me but several young women in India don't feel safe to travel in public transport. There are many instances of groping, cat calling and staring incidents within a bus or a busy street. But unfortunately, people don't come forward to help the victim in most cases. Take the example of Nirbhaya case where the victim and her friend they were lying on the street semi naked and badly injured but people turned their faces against them. It is after half an hour someone tried to help them. This is the case everywhere in India.

After the nirbhaya incident, police has become quick in reporting FIRs in such cases and also to start investigating as soon the incident is reported. But is it the only responsibility of the police to protect women of our country? No. Anyone can come forward and protect if they see something like this on their street. It will take years for the men of our country to come out of the myth that they are powerful and can do anything with women. We will have to stand up and stop this kind of crime.

Apart from the eve teasing and stalking in buses, taxis and autos are also no longer safer during night time. There has been a recent case of Uber taxi driver raping a young woman who was coming late from her office and dozed off in the taxi. Government's action for this.. ban Uber taxis. But this is not the only solution. Government should enforce the taxi companies to have a live gps tracking and if anyone tries to shut off the gps then immediately their details should be reported to the police. Such vigilance is definitely required by the cab companies. These issues should be eradicated from the grassroot levels. It is a social responsibility of everyone to come forward and help women when they fall in such situations. Having raised in India, I know that every women undergoes one or other form of public harassment. Usually, we are used to the common ones like eve teasing, stalking and cat calling in public but nowadays what I see is that women are more coming forward and reporting such incidents. Where as few years back these incidents were unreported as women felt uncomfortable in revealing the incident to the police. It will surely take more than a good security from police for controlling such situations.

Few things what could be done are: buses specially for women, women section in the buses, women police deployed at the vulnerable areas for patrolling, no place for men who drink and ride buses, women should be taught to shout and call people for help even for the smallest issue like someone brushing against them. Men should be given more stricter and humiliating punishments in public which would discourage future molesters. Often we see celebrities and famous people making hue and cry about women safety online and then nothing happens. I wish these people would take more action in their day to day life rather than just typing a big article directing towards the prime minister. Time has come that film industry should also be scrutinized for objectifying women in most of the films. India is the land where goddesses are worshiped. Then why this is happening with their own women ! After thinking and reading so much about this I take a pledge to stand against this issue. I hope you do the same.

Arranged marriages back into popularity

It was just a few years back that Love marriages had gained popularity in Indian society. It was mainly due to movies like "ek duje ke liye", "julie" and many more. People who were staunch believers of arranged marriages were gradually saying okay to the new trend. It is known fact that Indian society is highly influenced by the Bollywood movies. But now marriages seem to be on a declining rate every year. We hear lot of divorce stories these days. How did our society become open to this? Ours was a society that expected a "Sati Savitri" kind of bahus who would give their life if needed for their husband. Then how is this trend slowly changing to take divorce if you don't like him.

Rewinding it few year back where arranged marriages were thought to be uncool. Love marriages were the latest trend. People thought that people who never fell in love or individuals who were dominated by their families usually went for arranged marriages. So, now the trend seems to have moved back from this ideology. It is a surprising fact that many youngsters from the growing population are now inclining towards 'Arranged Marriage'. Arranged marriages have been in Indian society since decades and there is nothing new. Only thing is as the decades passed the definition of arranged marriage has been changing. In earlier days, arranged marriage was something where a bride doesn't meet groom before marriage and they both meet each other on the day of their marriage. Then how was the wedding fixed? It was fixed by the family members who met the bride and the groom individually. But it was surprising to know that those marriages sustained since centuries have passed. Was it because the married couple were more understanding or matured? Or due to the society they tried to bond together everyday even with some differences? These days you can meet your partner few months before the wedding and you can "officially" him/her to know likes and dislikes. This helps them to find a compatible life partner. So, I want to name it as "Arranged-cum-love" marriages since you can fall in love with the person after you get engaged to him. Plus, you have your full family support.

Whatever is the reason now, the 'Arranged marriages' are back with a different perspective. Few psychologists say that youngsters today don't have patience to work on a relationship. They are unable to sustain the relationships and that's why they are moving towards arranged marriage. One more possible reason is they fear if they fall in love and the relationship breaks. They are scared to fall in love again and make the relationship work. So, the best thing is to go for arranged marriage and who cannot fall in love once they are married! There is a lot of help available to the people these days who want to go for arranged marriage. They have the matrimonial websites, they can give a column in the news paper to find a match and also there is increased number of matrimonial offices in all the Indian cities. With this increased support it is not that hard to find a match right?

Womenology



What women want ? - This is probably a million dollar question for Men. Why do Men find it very difficult to answer this question? We might have probably read hundreds of articles on this topic or even saw the Movie - What women want ? or even heard many men discussing this everyday. What makes a woman to choose a particular man over others? On what basis or analysis do they choose to do certain things ? To answer some of these questions lets get into women facts or in other words understand Womenology. In this modern world of dating, attraction, sex and relationships - what women want has nothing to do with these. Lets not confuse guys more and get into the straight facts that Women want Men to know, if they want to understand them.


For starters, most of the women want men to make them feel good. Or in other words, women want to experience more emotionally content life with the man with whom she wants to spend her life with. To elaborate it further, to make a woman feel good around you, you must allow her to experience a wide range of desirable emotions. Unfortunately lot of men make the mistake of flirting with the woman in order to please her or try to be over friendly while interacting with her... none of which will turn her ON. So, if you want to get the attention just be yourself in front of her. Let the feelings come in automatically for you and then you will find your own ways to woo her!

Most women want guys to be Confident. Most men carry a false confidence in them which is not hidden in woman's eyes. They are very quick in picking up if he has a real confidence in himself. For women this quality is very important since if the guy is confident he will be creating a positive world around her and she can be sure that for any bad things that happen in their life they can together sort it out.

You should know what you want - All real men know what they want in their life and this what woman want in a man. They don't like guys who are confused and have absolutely no idea about what they are doing in their life !

Women want men to make them feel feminine and understand their sentiments. Most guys fail to understand this side of women but here are the reasons. In this modern world, because of the daily jobs or in other parts of their lives women are sometimes forced to behave in a masculine way (like men, or having emotions or thoughts like men) . So women desperately wish that they are with a man who knows how to make her feel like a real woman.

Lastly, what a woman wants is a man who is confident, unafraid to be his real self, unafraid to show his interest on her, unafraid to move things forward and who can understand her sentiments or emotions !!

It's not so complicated ... is it ??

Ctrl + Z -- Undo.. can we undo our actions ??


Ever wondered if we could use the basic command of computers in our real life !

We face lot of things in our life daily and the typical reaction among us is " Oh i wish .. i cud have done that instead of this " or " oh gosh ! i cud have not done this".. etc.. Lets see some scenarios and think..



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Scenario 1

Respected Guruji,
You are the only person in my life with whom i would like to share my sorrows. I learnt all your principles in my school days. I became a doctor, very famous one. I went abroad for my studies and spent half of my life in research. But i have done a grave mistake. I have messed up really bad. I hate myself. I don't know what to do.

So, i want to ask you O sage, O teacher, when God was creating this universe why didn't he give the power to humans to Undo their actions on their Life's keyboard??

Please reply to this perplexed disciple of yours... Where on earth is the UNDO function ??

Guruji replied to this disciple.

My dear Disciple,

Every UNDO function in the computer field serves the same purpose in different contexts. These contexts are set by the authors of that program.
So, in this case if you are trying to approach the author of Life's program then that's you and its just YOU. God created the universe, but a human being is responsible for his actions.

So, if you want to change your future ? Change your past ? then rewrite your character and your role in the story. Jump out of this fantasy land and become the real partner of all your realities.

-Your Guruji

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Scenario 2

A boy falls in love with a girl. He tries his level best to convince her that he loves her a lot. Slowly in the course of their relationship he realizes that he went ahead too fast ! She is not the girl he was looking for. So, he talks to the girl before she thinks about the marriage.

Ramesh : Hi Radha, i want to share something with you.
Radha : Yes Ramesh. I know what you want to say. My answer is " Yes"

Ramesh : Well, actually i wanted to say that we went ahead very fast. Now i feel I like Rashmi more than you. She told me yesterday how much she cares for me and how much she loves me. Moreover i too like her. I am sorry if i have hurt you in the meanwhile.


Radha was very disappointed. She cried alot after this incident. Her parents wanted her to go abroad and study further. They wanted her to become a great doctor. She too loved them so much, but she forgot about them when she was in a relation with Ramesh. Because of him she even left her parents' home and started staying in a hostel. Now after her love failed she wanted to commit suicide. But before that she writes a confession letter to her parents.

Dear Dad& Mom,
I know you both were the best parent anybody can have. You loved me so much, never restricted me to do the things which any parent would have done. You wanted me to grow in my career and become independent. But i spoilt my life behind an unfaithful boy. Now that i am carrying his child he wants to abondon me. With a heavy heart I am writing you this letter. All i want to say is I really Love you both. I don't know what to do with my life. I feel i can't marry other guy having Ramesh's child in me. I can't give birth to the child without his father in our life.

I wish there was the magic UNDO button in my life which would have taken this chapter out of my life. But unfortunately there is no such thing.

Your daughter

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After discussing these two stories, I want to conclude my views about Undoing actions in our real life. We do many stupid mistakes in our life. No matter how much grave mistake we do, the world sadly doesn't offer any " Undo" option to wipe out our actions. There is no way we can retract the stupid words that come out of our mouth in the spur of the moment. We can have excuses and apologies for some of them, but life doesn't give many chances for undoing our mistakes. But if we were to program a real life " undo" command, then we should execute it only for certain scenarios. For the rest of them, we should learn from our mistakes and try to correct them in the future.

After all to Err is Human.

Chetan Bhagat and his books

Chetan Bhagat has been my favorite author after i started reading his books and i am reading them over and over again. His books don't have the stylish vocabulary like other English authors, but the way he has written the stories -- AWESOME is the word for that. It makes any reader to read his book and stay glued. I started with Five point someone. I was reading this when i was on my vacation for my marriage. After my haldi ceremony i had two days where i wasn't really allowed to do anything. I was not even allowed to meet my would be husband. So, i started reading this book, chapter by chapter and yeahh i don't wanna lie but i finished the book within 2days!! I was so much into the characters that i felt as if i am right there in IIT,Delhi and seeing Hari, Ryan and Alok. That's the charisma of this writer. He brings the characters alive.

I wrote an email to Mr. Bhagat and he was kind enough to respond back to me within 15days. I was so excited when i read his email. I purchased his other three books and started reading them. According to me undoubtedly his best book is FPS. It was like a blockbuster hit. The book didn't really guide anyone how to get into IIT, but it definitely helped students to understand the pressure of IIT or any such college and how can you fall on your face if you want to play against the system.

Second one is 2 States. It was his story of how he married his wife Anusha. This story looks like any ordinary guy's story. First you fall in love with a girl and then realize how difficult it is to actually materialize the relation. For we Indians, as he mentioned on the book cover,

Boy loves Girl. Girl loves Boy.
Girl's family has to love boy. Boy's family has to love girl.
Girl's Family has to love Boy's Family. Boy's family has to love girl's family.
Girl and Boy still love each other. They get married
.

This was how Ananya and Krish got married in this book. The beauty of this book is how he has depicted the incidences where he goes to chennai and tries to woo her parents. The process of convincing parents is the best part in this book. The second best part is how they stick to their relationship after getting jobs and after finishing their studies. It is an eye opener for people who fall in love first and then realize that they cannot convince their parents and they break their relationship. At the end they get married and live happily ever after, just like we see in most of the movies. There is going to be a film on this book very soon.

Third one is 3 mistakes of my life. Well this book wasn't a humorous one. It was a pretty serious book. It is a story about a common guy from Ahmedabad who wanted to commit suicide after getting disappointed with his own life. This story is heart touching partly because i am an Amdavadi and i too underwent the trauma of earthquake and the riots just like Govind in this book did. But in his life he struggled alot to open his sports shop and how his dreams shattered when the building collapsed with the earthquake. But he didn't give up and he succeeded. I really appreciate Chetan ji to write a story like this. Even if its not about cool stuffs like IIT or call centers. It is a life lesson for many people. I tried to find that guy online using all sources orkut, google etc but somehow i couldn't track him down. I just wish if i could meet him once when i go to ahmedabad. He is the real life hero.

Anyways that's all for now. Waiting for more books from him. I emailed him asking what is his next book goin to be. But i m still waiting for his response. I am following him on twitter so that i know his updates..

Thoughts about Indian reality(or unreality ??) shows

"Mujhe talash hai ek aise jivan saathi ki, jiske saath main puri zindagi beetana chahti hoon".. these were the words of Rakhi sawant (with kal ho na ho music in the background) when the show "Rakhi ka swayamvar" started.

Welcome to the new era of indian television shows, The Reality shows. They are getting more hype in Indian tv industry after the huge success of indian idol, Kaun Banega Crorepati and MTV Bakra. Before then most of the indian tv serials were packed with the saas - bahu gossips or family oriented serials. But now its the time for the reality shows. They are increasing TRP ratings of the channels airing them. Hence, they are jumping into this league. There are wide variety of reality shows starting from "sach ka samna" to "rakhi ka swayamvar" to "indian idol". The television channels are busy in hunting for new themes and concepts for the reality shows.

But think about the impact it is making on the audiences and the contestants participating in them. For shows like Indian idol almost more than half of Indian youth population want to participate and become indian idol. They go live on the TV for audition and some of them get humiliated from the Judges. Some pass through this stage and actually enter the competition. But the way of rejecting candidates is not so sensible for the shows like Indian Idol. By public voting they eliminate the candidate who gets less number of votes. I think that is really stupid ! How would a general public know the knowledge of music and who is actually a good and talented singer. People vote usually to support contestant of their city or region which is really unfair for a talented singer with no such support. So, when a candidate gets rejected after reaching to a higher level because of this, it might dent the candidates psychology for sure. In my opinion, it should be 50-50 percent votes from public and judges to take a fair decision.

Lets talk about other shows such as "Rakhi ka swayamvar" or " Pati patni aur woh" ... These shows look like they were already scripted. There was no point of calling them as reality shows. Plus some bunch of guys have to propose to Rakhi and woo her to make her fall in love with the guy. Earlier in this show she promised that she is going to marry the person who is selected in the end. But turns out she just gets engaged, reason ( she needs more time....... WTH ???) What is the reason for the show then..... Isn't she famous enough to get an appropriate groom by herself.. Its just a television masala for the guys who want to see a bunch of contestants getting insulted from her. These type of tv shows are not doing any good to the public.

There are many shows nowadays which is encouraging our young generation to use bad words easily in public, or raise their hands against a girl or behave immorally in public. Where are the standards of these shows ??? They are degrading the quality standards for indian audiences.

Also, shows like "sach ka samna" are becoming more raw and personal. They intervene in celebrity or politicians life and ask the questions that could make them stand naked in the public. In the entire show, they ask 21 questions that probe into their personal history and darker side of their public image. However, some decent shows in this league are "Koffee with Karan", "Rendezvous with Simi Garewal".

MTV roadies have their own history of controversies. Season 1 was well received by the audiences. But slowly it is encouraging the contestants in using foul language and indulging them into unnecessary fights and making a big fuss about it on the TV !

However, reality shows have been a boon to the TV channels with increased TRP ratings and enormous advertising revenues. But they should realize that it shouldn't impact young audiences or participants even inadvertently.

Happy Indian independence... 15th August


Sare jahan se accha, hindustan hamara !! These were the lines quoted by Muhammad Iqbal in the year 1904 when India was still ruled by the British. I feel very patriotic when it comes to India or Indians. Even though i am away from India since 5yrs i feel i am very much connected to India and i belong to her. But i don't want to go into the emotional aspect of this post. I want to talk about the achievements of my country since ancient times.
India is a country of vast culture and traditions. Also, it is one of the fastest developing nations in Asia and the world. IT industry is blossoming since past few years in India, increasing the revenue and providing world class IT services across the globe. India's diverse economy encompasses wide range of sectors like Agriculture, handicrafts, IT industries etc.

Colors in the Indian flag are saffron, white and green. Saffron represents courage, sacrifice and spirit of renunciation. White represents purity and truth. While Green represents faith. The blue wheel in the middle represents the wheel of life in movement.

Lets focus on the achievements that India has which is remarkable.
  • India invented the number system. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
  • Sanskrit is the most oldest language and most of the European languages are somehow connected with it.
  • World's first university was established in Takshila in 700 B.C. More than 10,000 students from all over the world studied in that university. The University of Nalanda est in 4th century is also one of the greatest achievements of ancient india towards education.
  • Ayurveda, one of the ancient form of medicine was invented in India.
  • India was one of the richest countries in this world until it was attacked by Mohd Ghazni and also till 17th century until it was invaded by the British. Even Columbus wanted to discover India instead of America.
  • Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India. The value of pi was also invented by India. The place value system and the decimal system was invented by india in 100 B.C.
  • Chess was invented in India.
  • India is the largest democratic country in the world. Also, it is the country with the most ancient civilization.
  • Yoga and the spiritual science were found in India by the Indian saints who used to take penance in a forest for hundreds of years !
There is so much more to say about this country.

Reference:-
http://www.seanpaulkelley.com/?p=964

orkut vs facebook


Orkut and facebook are the most popular social networking sites these days on the internet. Facebook has become very popular in North America while Orkut has surpassed facebook and took over the market share in India. This is because Indians don't access the internet everyday and are not very eager to use social networking.

Before starting a detailed analysis lets see some recent facts. According to recent market studies, Facebook owns 11.5% of market share, while Orkut holds just 1%. Facebook was launched later than Orkut. Facebook is becoming the best social networking site in this world.

Why Orkut is lagging behind in this race, even though it is accompanied by Google ??

Let discuss the Pros and cons of both networking sites:-

Interface - User interface is one of the main concern for the growth of these networking sites. They should be simple enough to attract common public who don't browse web pages more. This is more applicable to countries other than United States. Orkut succeeded in doing this. Orkut page is so simple to browse. It doesn't need any help tutorial to start with. While Facebook, on the other hand is little complex to understand. Orkut however has started prompting users to change their profile page to a new layout but people still want to use the old interface because it is very simple !

Facebook Connect - This is the crispiest feature in Facebook that allows you to re-connect with your old buddies. You have to just type your school name or workplace name and facebook pulls out information available from millions of users. Additionally, facebook suggests its users at time to time basis to add a new friend if he is in that networking circle.

Social gaming - Social gaming has become a huge success for facebook's popularity. There are thousands of games integrated in facebook and there are about 83 million facebook users for Farmville game. Similarly, there are many other games in facebook which is liked by many users like Mafia wars, Cafe World etc. Orkut on the other hand doesn't really have these many social apps.

Security - Recently, Facebook is facing lot of problems related to user's security. People can find other people's information and pictures by just visiting their websites. Facebook has started taking this very seriously, since it can lead to its downfall. Even user profile information is being extracted by all those social gaming agencies. Orkut on the other hand has implemented privacy settings long back and the user can change the settings as and when required. So, it was never under any controversy.

Restricted networking - If you want to be a part of your companies profile in facebook, you need to provide company's email address in order to be a part of the network. While on orkut, you can hit join button and that will do the job. If the communities are moderated then moderator has to accept your request. But still it doesn't really hold a solid proof for joining that network. Also, if you add a new friend on facebook since he is in your office, then he can request for other informations like office id etc inorder to add you.

Feeds of Activity - Anything that is done on facebook is maintained as a record. If you add a picture, or you are tagged in a picture, when someone added a new friend, or someone got married etc everyone gets to know this. Know this is questionable... For some people it is okay to spread the information while for some people it is not a good feature.

Tagging relationship status - If someone is in a relationship, or someone got married they can change their status and they can tag their partner in their profile if they are also in the Facebook. I found this interesting when i opened a Facebook account for my husband !

Orkut communities - Orkut maintains a huge database of user communities. There are many discussions going on in these communities. This feature is widely used in asian countries and they find it pretty helpful specially when you want to propage some message.

Orkut has some good features such as - Integration of google chat in your profile, No. of times someone views your profile, saving profile links of people whom you randomly find on the network etc.

Well, inspite of all these positive points still Facebook is leading in America. I personally have both orkut and facebook accounts. I use Orkut to connect to my friends and see their developments since most of my friends and relatives live in India. While i use Facebook daily for updating my status, playing social apps and connecting with my friends and colleagues.

Is china the next super power ?

The term "super power" must have evolved from the US - Russia relationship. Lets talk about the super power nations. What is exactly meant by being a "super power nation" ? A nation that is capable of influencing the entire world.

For this what could be the basic requirements -
  • A country should be able to influence events and its own interests to the world.
  • It should be economically very strong and should provide monetary support to other big countries.
  • Technology wise it should be at the advanced level.
  • It should have advanced millitary and have excessive power interms of nuclear resource. In short, a country that dominates in political and millitary power.
So, i have few questions popping in my mind now - Is China on the brink of becoming a truly global power? Is it already there?

Well, this is debatable. Lets see where China is standing right now and then we can compare its progress with the United States of America & India.

It is very much possible that in next few years China can emerge as a most powerful country in the world. The speed with which China has been catching up in terms of technology is mind blowing. With the overwhelming population of people and their zest for improvement and learning, there is a definite chance of China being a super power. China is not a poor country like Haiti or Bosnia where involvement of US government is necessary. It can stand up on its own. The government and the people of China can make this nation set to be the next economic super power. If you take a look at any US market, virtually all the items from toys to clothings are made in china. The US consumer is tied with China. So, if the huge market collapses then there would be poverty in china on a scale where it can force people and leaders to go for a war with neighboring countries. So, the USA & China have become economically dependent on each other and yet frightened of each other. So, this is just the economical and technological aspect of this country. However, if we consider military technology then US is much ahead of china in this aspect.
But still i would say China atleast holds the key to the world's economic well being. The country is trying to become a power house for global manufacturing and production. There are many companies in the global market who have a production unit in China. There is no secret that chinese electronic goods are the cheapest in the market and widely sold. However, we can't guarantee about its functioning sometimes ??????

In a business week article, it was claimed that China & India are facing off to see who will be the next super power. Lets compare the standards and political conditions in India and china.

  • China has an authoritarian regime, while India still hosts democracy. It has been proved in history that authoritarian regime often renders impressive short term economic growth and development. Eg. China in 1990s. Whereas, democratic regimes tend to be very sloppy with public arguments, vocal press and stubborn land lords. Hence, rapid economic growth is out of the question. It more leads to social distortion.
  • India has an active democracy, but it is highly corrupt.
  • While China has a legal system that doesn't protect the intellectual property rights. China sells pirated movies, software & music widely in the world market.
In this century, where countries are advancing so fast in terms of technology and living standards where is our country ??







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