Is falling in love a one time affair? - Against

When we say we are in love then it means that we feel a strong physical attraction for another person which is coupled with a psychological component. This component might be seeing the person being showered with flowers or seeing the person with such a magical glass that negates any other opinions for him/her. This is the time we would think that yes we found that person who completes my life. It comes with other packaged feelings that this new 'Love' knows about us better than anyone in this world. Even more amazing fact is that we manage to discover about our new 'Love' from just few moments to few weeks!

Is the idea of being in love is really about 'being in love with the idea of 'being in love'' ??Confusing isn't it.

When we are actually in 'Love' and captivated with cupids arrows we try to focus on how the person will complete us and fulfill all our desires. We initially believe that if this person is in our life then we will never see our tears again, never be unhappy anytime. Unfortunately, within few short weeks or months, the heightened sense of arousal and emotional rush of "falling in love" will slowly diminish. Slowly, "Falling in love" becomes "Fallen in love" and then we conclude that we no longer have feelings for this person. Now what happens after that?

Things go wrong from all the directions and we feel helpless. Have we ever thought that falling in love is not merely a passing statement but it involves making a conscious choice to invest in another human being. A long term relationship demands sacrifice of self and commitment to the desires of our loved one. When we realize this we will abandon 'falling in love' concept and try to adapt 'loving our loved one'.

Lets move on to what happens when relationship breaks. Often the pain of breaking up with someone you have loved dearly can be painful. It takes long time to build a relationship and after being in a relation for long period, you've probably invested lot of time and emotions into making it work. Unfortunately, not all relationships are bound to work. Next question is how do we deal with this? We come across variety of emotions like anger, frustration, sadness, depression etc and we sometimes tend to be suicidal. The only way to deal with this period is to try to take the required time to think why the relationship failed.

If you are realistic to yourself and the life, then be optimistic. There is nothing like one time love. There is nothing like one time for anything in life. Failures are the success stones for a brighter future. The adolescence time is the phase where we first encounter this feeling of 'falling in love'. There are high chances that its not love, its just infatuation which we tend to think as love. If at all you are matured enough to know love at that time then fight for it. But if your love fails then instead of wasting your life, be realistic and eliminate your mistakes. Spend sometime with yourself and soon this roller-coaster of emotions will pass and you will be ready to plunge into this ocean again!

This post has been published as a part of THE GREAT DEBATERS Topic: IS FALLING IN LOVE A ONE TIME AFFAIR ; the first edition of the Bloggers Debate; If you like this post then FAVE it here and read other entries as well. The Great Debaters at Blogjunta


  1. Good Argument Varsha. But I dont agree with the physical attraction first. Love is not only romance. So in the beginning its absolutely an emotional attraction. I agree with you that falling in love is not a one time experience, same time it can be too. What I argue that there is no permanent rule set for anything in this world. So cant reject or accept the concept of falling in love is one time affair. Even the author's write up is two sided. How can we take one side and argue for that ?

  2. wow! some interesting and other wonderful points brought up varsha...i liked ur idea of taking up the relationship on the whole..from start till end and focussing on what actually the majority of us face in life. reallyyy good attempt :))


  3. Dear Varsha,
    We love your take on the topic.
    We request you submit this entry to our show case
    Section: GREAT DEBATERS, Category: Falling in love
    You can access the show case here

    All the others posts all also there. That way you ll get more reads

  4. yess i just added it to correct catagory.. thanks blogjunta :)

  5. Thanks Sarah.. i don't believe there is one time for anything.. love, job interview, exam anything.. infact ppl who fail more they know the right path of success..

  6. Varsha,
    I am so glad youwrote against the topic and so did sarah.
    My freinds were like you have taekn a wrong stand, no one will support you in this.Everyone will write for the topic.
    But if they see your posts they will know you have done a great job

  7. thanks Muddassir. I don't know why ur friends told u tht .. u shd tell him that if there was any one time thing in love then millions of ppl wud have been left unmarried and disappointed in love..

  8. Varsha, this is a good writeup.. The points about commitment, failure, pain and then once again to ocean are too good.. But Personally I feel 'Falling in love is once a lifetime feeling'...

    Someone is Special


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